Ladies and gentlemen, gather around, for today is a historic day. After what felt like an eternity of suffering, after countless hours of begging, borrowing, and borderline considering a career in goblin crime, I have finally done it.
I HAVE A MECHANOSTRIDER. 🎉🎉🎉
Christmas came early this year, my friends. Praise the Light,Elune, the Titans, the Earthmother, and whoever invented these ridiculous mechanical birds. No longer will my tiny gnome legs be doomed to endless marathons across Azeroth. No longer will I stare enviously at mounted players, muttering curses under my breath. I AM ONE OF THEM NOW.
Was it easy? Absolutely not. I had to:
✔ Farm herbs until I saw imaginary flowers when I closed my eyes.
✔ Fish so much that I started answering to “Master Angler.”
✔ Loot every single item possible, even if it was a bent spoon.
✔ Run so many errands for NPCs, I basically became their personal assistant.
✔ Live in poverty because spending gold on food or gear was for weaklings.
But it was all worth it. Because now, I zoom across the land like a true gnome genius, atop a clunky, loud, and slightly ridiculous mechanostrider. It squeaks, it rattles, and it sounds like it might explode at any moment—but it’s mine.
So, to all my fellow mountless adventurers out there—stay strong. Your day will come. Until then, I’ll be the blur speeding past you, waving from my saddle, knowing I never have to run anywhere ever again.
(…Until level 60 when I have to do this all over again for an epic mount. Send help. 😭)